Church Withdrawal

One said to not judge a book by its cover, but you can judge this blog by its title.

These past three weeks have been extraordinary. Skimming all the photos I took, I can't believe I was able to actually see, eat, and do so much. Not everyone gets an opportunity like this and I'm really happy and satisfied with all that has happened. However, I have been feeling home away from home-away from my church community, christian friends, and being close to God: church withdrawal that is.

As much fun as I have been having, I feel that its just on the surface if you don't have a spiritual aspect within capturing all of it step by step, sort of like a inner lens reflecting on every miniscule detail. To be honest, at times I do feel I have forgotten about God or have distanced from him, sometimes by my own means as I have just been directing my plans as I wish, other times, I just haven't had the opportunity to go to church. Despite all of it, I hear that little voice in my head calling me and directing my conscience when I am afar. In a way, when you lose sight of God, and am not talking to him on a regular basis, I find that your values and standards start to break down. Its like if you don't wash your mug after one drink, you barely notice the stains, but after a second, third, or fourth time, the stain will become distinctly visible and it gets harder to wash it off. Temptation has taken its toll on me in this sense and I feel I have fallen into the devil's traps and lies more than I should have.

Having said all that, I was really looking forward to finally being able to go to church with the English speaking Christian club on campus today, Emmaus (pronouced E-may-us). I didn't know if I had expectations as I have heard a lot about Korean churches and their giant congregations, but this one was oriented towards a more younger generations so I didn't think it be one of those traditional churches people talk about. The service started at 1pm but we headed out from our dorms at 11am as it took almost and hour to get there. Also, they provided lunch before service for the cost of 1000won ($1cad).

Entering the sanctuary, it was about one and a half times the size of NEAC's fellowship hall, but it was packed with people of different ethnicity and was predominantly composed of college students, young adults, and young families. They had a countdown clock going to ensure that they started right on time. It was so amazing to be able to worship with familiar songs again and knowing that I was worshiping at the same time as NEAC at one point (as there was a praise & worship night going on with ECAC during that exact time) felt like we were all one in a spiritual connection, drawn together by the song lyrics (I had wrote on the wall of the P&W event that I be there in spirit and it actually felt like I was!). The congregation was also very enthusiastic and would say things outloud, shout Amen, and even say their prayers and feelings while singing, which was a new experience for me. The pastor was also very contemporary in his speech and even used slang. His sermon was very humorous and engaging and despite feeling sleepy, I was attentive for the most part.

The part that I wasn't accustomed to was that the culture of Korean churches, as they tend to pray a lot and how they pray. When we were given time to pray after the worship, people just said their prayers aloud (loud and clear), I didn't at first and it was actually hard to concentrate praying in my mind, so I ended up praying outloud too, though, not as loud as the others did. Near the end of the service, the pastor also called out on first timers and random people in the congregation up front to pray for them with a ministry or staff member infront of the whole congregation. I felt uneasy for the people up there, especially if it was their first time, but everyone was very welcoming about it and didn't show any sign of discontent. After service, they had a room for new comers to go to where they received a little bag of goodies, engaged in ice breakers, and snacks for you to enjoy.

Also, there doesn't seem to be an issue with the time frame of services in Korea. Service went from 1pm to 3pm (the pastor joked it use to go until 4pm) and afterwards they have a snack break followed by a bible study from one of the classes you have chosen. I found out there was also a prayer session before service, so I assume church in Korea can last the whole day. It made it clear to me why the streets and public transit were so quiet on Sundays, and why even some independent stores closed or opened later than usual. Church is highly respected and attended by many in Korea and it was really heart warming to acknowledge that.

Overall, the experience was really friendly and welcoming, I don't think there was anyone I didn't make contact with that didn't come approach me and say hi or shook my hand or even give me a hug (and I just met them). Some moments were more unusual than what I'm use to, but that's just because it was different and new to me. For now I will continue to come to this church, but I don't know if it will be a 'home' church yet. I will have to church hop more and experience God in new settings.

I don't usually ask for anything in my blogs, but I would like you to pray for me. Pray that I pursue God during this exchange and accomplish the plans he has for me this term. I get distracted and lose sight of my path easily, but like I learned in the sermon today, "God is the ultimate GPS system, even if you step a little off the track, or head out on your own path, He will reroute you back to the destination he wants you to be."

God will also keep track of us no matter where we go, what we do, who we see, how we think, and when we think of Him or not.

I'm Officially Missing You

I'm so sad I'm leaving. I've been anticipating for a long time now that this one emotion will arrive, and finally it has come to take it's toll on me. It's eating me inside out and it has override all my other emotions. I know I won't be gone forever, but I'm so sappy knowing I won't see my family, pets, friends, church, school and even Edmonton for tentatively five months!

I'm so grateful for all the well wishes, blessings and messages showered on me lately. It means so much and I can't imagine going away for so long now. It makes me wonder what I will do if I choose to move one day.

Boo. I'm sounding like a twenty year old and a half cry baby. But really, from the bottom of my heart, I will miss all of you lots!

LOTS!

Bye now.