Communication Loss

I realized I never shared the story of how I lost my phone over the holidays in Vancouver. So on boxing day, my friends and I decided to go to Metrotown, a mall in Burnaby, and while I was in Forever 21 (hint hint, nudge nudge, please don't go to F21 on boxing day, there's nearly NO sales, and although its two levels, people are everywhere and line ups are so long that they are intertwined between racks and shelves of clothing and you can't even find the end, and on top of it all, there's a DJ blasting loud music, so you can hardly talk or hear a thing)I lost my phone.

I was holding a shirt I bought in a bag and kept my phone in there for easy accessibility, instead of having to put it back in my bag and taking it out every time I needed it. It was also more convenient, since I had split up with my three other friends- easier to grab the phone when it rang. Anyhow, I was holding onto a bunch of clothes I had grab and because the store was so packed and my thoughts were in a million places, I just put my phone back into my bag without looking if it actually went back into the brown bag, and shortly after, I realized I had lost my phone. I freaked out. This was the first time I had ever loss my phone, and it just had to be in a different city and right when I separated from my friends, all on my own. So I pushed myself through the mobs of people to ask the manager if she could make an announcement, and guess what? She said they don't have an intercom (in my head I was like, how could you not?! Your store is two levels, how do you call an employee to come upstairs/downstairs! Every store has one! I bet she said that to me so I would go away, but to my luck, a nice employee took down my hotel number in case anything turned up (she even felt sorry for me because I was not from Vancouver). Since there was a DJ, I asked if he could turn down the music and make an announcement for me, well he didn't do it, but he put the mic in my face and I made verbal headlines to the shoppers of Forever 21 about a lost green Sony Ericsson with a red bow phone charm. I sounded like an idiot. No News. Nothing. Fortunately, I found one of my friends in the store in line and she notified the others of my lost phone.

I was close to giving up, I really thought my phone was either broken from all the customers walking around in the store or buried under a pile of clothes or stolen. I realize how important communication was. Before I found one of my friends, I kept questioning what I was going to do; I had walked around the store a million times, looked upstairs and downstairs, retraced my steps, did I have to wait until they closed to dig through the piles of clothes and hope that my only means of communication would turn up? I wasn't even aware of how important a phone was until this incident! Even when my friend and I decided to grab lunch and leave the store, I was hesitant because I thought all my chances were gone if I left the store. Typical me, I just kept on ranting and worrying and not buying anything. It was definitely a miserable boxing day and my mood was dictating everything.

So how did I find my phone? Well, one of my friends who was off on her own was logical enough to text my phone in case someone did pick it up. I guess I was too caught up in my conclusions to even logically think of ways of contacting my phone. After an hour or so, YES, there are still nice people on this planet! A girl and her mom had actually picked up my phone and held onto it! I assume they left the store before I made my verbal diarrhea. I was so relieved. I couldn't believe it. Within moments, I had gone from digging up a giant depressing hole to bury myself in to literally lighting up with joy. The power of one's mood eh?! I couldn't thank God enough. But then it hit me, that God had plan this incident so I would focus back on Him rather than on the sales and discounts. I had recalled the night before, praying to God to keep me on track and not let secular things get to me.

Anyhow, the point of this story? I learned a big lesson from that incident, but lately I've been feeling disconnected. I feel as if I lost my phone again, but this time not physically lose my phone. I don't know who or what I should be plugged into and I just don't know about a lot of things. I'm kind of stuck in a way, stuck as if I was hesitating to leave F21 because I thought if I did, all communication would be loss. All of it. I just don't feel connected to any signal and I have planted bushes of "what if" trees in my disconnected garden. If I apply that incident to where I am now, I should know that God will provide a light out of this dim tunnel, that he will lead me and tell me what I should be doing or going or focusing on. But I can't cope with that proposed conclusion because as I said, I'm digging up a giant hole for myself, and until a logical and perhaps miraculous rope arrives to pull me up, I will keep digging.

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